[ There's a huff that's kind of like a snort, but not much more. What is laughing. Impossible. ]
It's not something that haunts me. It has been years since then.
[ Tsurumaru himself can see that Joonghyuk doesn't have the same demeanor as the memory. He doesn't seem downtrodden or sorrowful, taken in by the depths of his own despair. In the end, he's saying he doesn't need that consideration like he's wounded.
But he gives the bottle since Tsurumaru wants it? He doesn't want a cursed thing that did that. ]
(No, Tsurumaru just doesn't like prying into people's past conflicts. It means opening himself up to the same treatment and he's never been good at talking about himself.
He reaches to take the bottle from him and holds it gently in his hands,)
A return for what's been shared.
(And he gives the bottle a little shake to trigger the piece--)
The crane is an auspicious symbol that means many things. One of the meanings is "loyalty" for a crane only bonds with one other for life and should anything happen to one, the other will die soon after. When you were given to your master, who was just a boy too small to even carry you for himself, "loyalty" had been one of the wishes his family had hoped you would bring to him and the family.
And yet, they attack on a cold, white winter day. There had been a restlessness in the air earlier that morning. By noon, chaos breaks out.
The doors slide open with such force, it shakes the entire room. Several servants rush inside wearing heavy, layered robes. The white of their socks are specked and splattered with blood. They leave a faint trail behind them as they drag a small boy— your master— into the room with a sense of desperation and urgency. They push him to the back of the room towards you, covering him with their robes and bodies. Some of them cry and begin to pray.
One of them cries out exactly what is on your mind, How could this happen? Hadn't they only ever been loyal? Who would believe that they were conspiring against the regency?
The most senior lady in waiting pushes through, shoving a knife into the boy's hand, and explains how, no matter what, he must not let the Hojo or Yoritsuna take him. It's better to die by his own hand than to be at their mercy. The boy looks up at them with wide eyes.
The doors are thrown out of their frames as a group of swordsmen enter. One of the servants draws a small dagger from her waistband and immediately cuts her stomach. Another tries to follow suit but is too slow for the enemy's sword that comes down on her. The remaining servants push back on the boy until he trips into you, knocking you onto the floor. As they cover him with their kimono, you, too, are covered in darkness. The women scream, your master begins to cry. You feel heavy as the bodies fall on top of you, the ground below you becomes warm and wet.
The winter sun begins to set.
This moment that is one of your earliest memories will always stay with you.
The bright white of your spirit is painted with red and darkness.
[ Just because Tsurumaru had to see his, doesn't mean he is obligated to share. Joonghyuk would never ask someone to go through that, but it's too late now, isn't it. The memory takes them both and he has to watch whatever memory bleeds out.
He doesn't look away from what plays like a story of the past. It doesn't dishearten him for as many years they've lived, they've seen many atrocities like this.
It doesn't stop from the heart from feeling, however. No matter how many times... There is always a dull ache. A resonating pang as a reminder on quieter days. ]
Nothing has stopped you from asking before. (He's noticed the questions Joonghyuk has thrown his way at times. The ones that have tried to find understanding in why he is the way that he is.) By now you know not all questions receive answers.
(He looks away and becomes quiet. It feels dangerous answering this question, considering what he was summoned to do in the first place. Thoughts like this are intrusive. They start and grow and eventually you come back to the same scenario and question again and again. And if they ever found themselves in that moment again, would they act on those scenarios they'd dreamed about? Or would they stay true to their mission? )
Do you know my name? Do you understand what it means to be named "crane?"
[ To be honest, this is the worst pair because Joonghyuk is the one that goes back in time to change the past and Tsurumaru has to grip onto the present tightly. It is very funny... Even the memory that Tsurumaru saw was Joonghyuk choosing the past to start again, hoping for a happy ending. ]
That is a name given to you, but it doesn't need define you unless you want it to.
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It's not something that haunts me. It has been years since then.
[ Tsurumaru himself can see that Joonghyuk doesn't have the same demeanor as the memory. He doesn't seem downtrodden or sorrowful, taken in by the depths of his own despair. In the end, he's saying he doesn't need that consideration like he's wounded.
But he gives the bottle since Tsurumaru wants it? He doesn't want a cursed thing that did that. ]
cw; suicide, death of a child
He reaches to take the bottle from him and holds it gently in his hands,)
A return for what's been shared.
(And he gives the bottle a little shake to trigger the piece--)
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[ Just because Tsurumaru had to see his, doesn't mean he is obligated to share. Joonghyuk would never ask someone to go through that, but it's too late now, isn't it. The memory takes them both and he has to watch whatever memory bleeds out.
He doesn't look away from what plays like a story of the past. It doesn't dishearten him for as many years they've lived, they've seen many atrocities like this.
It doesn't stop from the heart from feeling, however. No matter how many times... There is always a dull ache. A resonating pang as a reminder on quieter days. ]
You know you've opened a door to questions.
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Nothing has stopped you from asking before. (He's noticed the questions Joonghyuk has thrown his way at times. The ones that have tried to find understanding in why he is the way that he is.) By now you know not all questions receive answers.
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[ It really is simple as that, but Joonghyuk doesn’t sound as demanding as he usually does. ]
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(The ones that tell you things you'd wish you'd never known? The ones that are serious and bring misfortune to everyone? He wonders.)
Ask your questions, Yoo Joonghyuk.
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[ So he will suffer for the truth. If the truth haunts him, then so be it, to be honest. That is his stance. ]
What did you wish you could have done in that situation?
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(It's something he can say without hesitation and he takes a step back, holding out his arms some for Joonghyuk to see and speaks plainly,)
This form that was given to me by my master is new. Before, I couldn't move on my own. I followed whoever could take me. All I could do was watch.
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[ It is what Tsurumaru wished he could have done, not what he did. ]
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Tch.
(He looks away and becomes quiet. It feels dangerous answering this question, considering what he was summoned to do in the first place. Thoughts like this are intrusive. They start and grow and eventually you come back to the same scenario and question again and again. And if they ever found themselves in that moment again, would they act on those scenarios they'd dreamed about? Or would they stay true to their mission? )
Do you know my name? Do you understand what it means to be named "crane?"
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That is a name given to you, but it doesn't need define you unless you want it to.
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The crane is auspicious. It represents long life, peace, and happiness. To be named after the crane means to bring that luck to those who carry me.
Why wouldn't I want to be that?
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[ It is the reality of things, but: ]
The motif of the crane is what you want to latch onto. [ … ] It isn't a bad thing.
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If I could, I would give my master many peaceful days and interrupt only in moderation.
(A long and happy life, he thinks.
As for which master he would wish for, he doesn't say.)
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[ Wasn't this easy? ]
rattles my notifs ignore this if u want
You're making a wish for me?
KLKLGSLK
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(He can work with this.)
Yoo Joonghyuk! I heard many wishes from the past. (In his memory.) Will you tell me what you wish for now? What is your wish for today and tomorrow?
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... A good day.
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(Laughs in previous conversations.)
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But Yoo Joonghyuk, surely you could let yourself wish for more. Between "a day" and "forever" there's plenty of options.
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[ he works a lot and yet he knows how to not burn out when it comes to tasks. ]
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Then I will wish for you to have a good day again and again.
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